Tag Archives: Bread of life

Church @ A Chipotle Restaurant {God’s Giving, God’s Glory}

“…Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love Me?’ He said, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed My sheep.” John 21:17 

*I am sharing this confession not to boast about my sin. Sin is not a laughing matter, it actually makes me mourn. I share this to boast about my God, to testify He is alive and His Spirit still convicts the world of sin, righteousness and judgment and He uses yielded vessels to show His love. This true story is an example of how I willfully made choices not to grieve Him with my disobedience–even though it wasn’t first time obedience.

I like Chipotle Restaurants and I love God.

To love God is easier said than shown.  God says, ‘If you love me you will keep my commandments’ (John 14:15). God’s two greatest commandments involve the word LOVE so I’d say love is very important to God.  I’m learning love is an action, not a feeling–you can’t love without giving and this particular sunny California day God was about to teach me again about His love….

Before I left the garage of my Grandma’s house to pick up our lunch I prayed God would give me an opportunity to share life giving words to a hungry soul.  Twenty minutes later I was paying for my favorite meal and excited to return to my Grandma to share the goodness of this perishable food when God answered my forgotten prayer.  As I looked towards the exit door I saw a homeless man outside.  I quickly looked for another exit so I wouldn’t have to pass by him and be bothered when all of a sudden the Holy Spirit convicts me of my lack of love. God ordered my steps…He told me to go out the door near the homeless man: it was my choice to obey or not.  I obeyed. As I walked out he asked for change and tells me he is very hungry. Not wanting my food to get cold, and remembering I have no cash, I selfishly tell him I have nothing to give him and I walk away. I was wrong.

The Holy Spirit gently reminded me of the change in my wallet and the change of my heart. I turn back and excitedly say,

“Wait, I do have change to give you!”

He thanked me, and as I dug through my wallet I asked him his name. Joey. I asked Joey if he knows the Lord Jesus Christ. Of course he knows about Jesus Christ, he lives in America where the Gospel is plentiful, but after a few words about God I could tell he did not know God. Joey was hungry for more than perishable food. Joey was telling me about lent and said a few incorrect things. I shared with Joey about what God had been teaching me about a different type of fasting.  A fasting that happens as a result of being mournful and sorrowful for my sin and disobedience towards God when I become too distraught about my sin I can’t eat. I asked him if he knew about that kind of fasting? He shook his head. I asked him if he knew the love of God and shared the Word:

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life” (John 3:16)

I went on to share what Jesus Christ says eternal life is:

This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent” (John 17:3)

Joey looks intently at me and says, “I met people like you the other day.”

I smile and respond, “Joey that is God sending you messengers desiring for you to be reconciled to God, to come back to Him. I know this to be true because I prayed to meet someone that needed to hear God’s words and God sent me you.”

With my eyes filled with tears I looked into Joey’s eyes and said, “Joey God loves you with an everlasting love and He forgives you and wants you to follow Him.” Joey’s lips quiver and his eyes begin to well up with tears threatening to burst.  I asked him if he believed that? He didn’t say anything. I told him I would pray he will believe and that God would send more messengers to him and I turn to walk away again and look around me. I begin to get angry at all ‘these people’ who have and don’t give…then God convicted me of the log in my eye and I mourned for my sin because I am ‘these people’ again God speaks to my heart:

If a brother or sister is without clothing and in need of daily food, and one of you says to them, ‘go in peace, be warmed and be filled,’ and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that? Even so faith, if it has no works, is dead, being by itself.” James 2:15-17

But whoever has the world’s goods, and sees his brother in need and closes his heart against him, how does the love of God abide in him? Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and in truth” 1 John 3:17

Full of unspeakable joy I tell Joey, “God just told me to buy you lunch, come inside with me!” He is in shock.

What Joey didn’t know was this required me to die to self and walk in faith.  I didn’t have the money to buy this meal but I knew God told me. I shared James 2:15-17 with Joey and we walk up to the counter and I see the look of shock in the faces of the employees, some with disgust. I asked him to order whatever he wanted and he says, “Uh, just chips and salsa please.” I reply, “Is that all you want? You said you were hungry.” I realized he had never stepped foot in this restaurant before and the looks of the employees were distracting him so I ordered him exactly what I ordered myself following God’s command to love your neighbor as yourself. As I was placing Joey’s order I couldn’t help the tears that were streaming down my face–it was a mixture of mourning and joy.

The mourning was for my delayed obedience and for Joey’s spiritual famine…he doesn’t know Jesus Christ, the love of the Father, and the comfort of the Holy Spirit. The joy was for God’s compassion and forgiveness and that God chose me to show Joey His love.

When I get to the cash register the young lady takes my card to charge and another employee comes from behind and cancels our order and says, ‘It’s all taken care of.” I burst with the first thing in my heart, “Praise God! Thank you!” Just when I think I am finished God tells me to sit with Joey and give thanks and pray with him. Again, I die to self because I didn’t know where his hands had been and God was specific: to pray holding his hands. I obeyed. We sit amongst a crowded area and I pray as the Holy Spirit gave utterance. After we prayed I knew I was done because I was overcome with the peace, love and joy that filled my heart. I told Joey I would continue to pray for him as the LORD reminded me and I left a different person. The restaurant was silent as I felt all eyes watch me leave and I knew God was glorified in that place.

Jesus says:

Beware of practicing your righteousness before men to be noticed by them; otherwise you have no reward with your Father who is in heaven” (Matthew 6:1)

I share this encounter with you to praise God with me and to testify of His LOVE. As I have confessed, my flesh wanted to walk the other way three times. My flesh wanted to:

  • Deny Joey money
  • Deny Joey God’s eternal food
  • Deny Joey perishable food
  • Deny Joey intercession
  • Deny Joey love

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever” (Psalm 73:26).

God’s Spirit directed my steps and it is His righteousness that deserves all the praise, honor and glory! God is glorified because it was His giving:

  • God gave His Son Jesus Christ to reconcile me to Himself allowing me to have a heart to love, ears to hear Him, eyes to see
  • God gave me His Holy Spirit, the comforter that teaches me and guides me in Truth and brings to remembrance God’s Word
  • God gave me the courage to obey
  • God even took care of the cost of Joey’s lunch!

I am a vessel. I desire to be a yielded vessel of God’s mercy, grace and LOVE. My faith was strengthened that day and I was no longer hungry because I had been filled.

Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has seen God at any time; if we love one another, God abides in us, and His love is perfected in us.” 1 John 4:11-12

“Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making an appeal through us; we beg you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.” 2 Corinthians 5:20

 “Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven”. Matthew 5:16

**I realize there are people that will want to take advantage, and who knows, maybe that was Joey’s intention but God’s Word tells us only He knows the thoughts and intentions of a man’s heart. My calling is to remain connected to the True Vine and follow and obey the prompting of the Holy Spirit. I am not telling you to give anything, I am not the Holy Spirit, there is only One God and He is looking for yielded vessels to inhabit to pour out His love, I pray you are one of them**

 


A Restored Heart Reveals

"...But the things that proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man." Matthew 5:18

Out of the heart the mouth speaks…
Out of the heart the pen writes…
Out of the heart the fingers type…

Out of my heart thoughts form into words, and these words sometimes come out of my mouth…on pen and paper, and occasionally online…in all cases it reveals a lot about the state and condition of my heart.

  • Is it a heart of stone unwilling to mold and change or a heart of flesh soft and teachable?
  • Is it an unforgiving heart holding on to grudges, or a heart choosing to extend grace?
  • Is it prideful, arrogant and unrepentant or humble, broken and contrite?
  • Is it greedy unwilling to share, or generous and gracious ?
  • Is it a heart seeking the favor and trying to please others, or a heart seeking God’s Kingdom and bond-servant of Jesus Christ?
  • Is it insecure, envious and jealous or secure in Jesus Christ, thankful and content?
  • Is my heart divided and indecisive or whole and convicted and led by the Holy Spirit?
  • Are God’s commandments on my heart?

Each time I turn the computer on, I take a spiritual inventory of my heart and search it and ask, “am I reading and writing from the new heart God gave me or the old one?”

My words, whether written or spoken reveal the color of my heart. Is it green with envy or red covered by the blood of Jesus Christ–Pure.  My greatest desire as a writer is for me to write only when my heart is pure, when I can write Who I see–God.

Unlike talking and speaking (which I also enjoy), when I write there is a longer “grace” period between heart to thought to delivery; I can pray more fervently BEFORE I write, I pray AS I write, I pray again before I press “publish” and I continue to pray for the hearts that will read. With writing I have my ‘editor in chief’ (AKA: my husband) review and approve each entry.  I realize I can do that with talking too…think before I speak~”Taking every thought captive to the obedience of Jesus Christ” (my Eternal editor in chief).

I truly understand David, a man after God’s own heart when he wrote under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit: “Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.” (Psalm 19:14)

So what does your heart say about you these days? I put some ‘bread‘ below for you to chew on…

Almighty Father, thank You for allowing me to share what You teach me. Its been 6 months since You called me to write on this blog, please continue to help me to write by the power of Your Holy Spirit. Thank you for my new heart, a whole heart devoted to You, may I quickly confess and repent those days I forget you gave me a new heart or when my heart changes color or hardens. I want to please You. I am Yours. In Jesus name I pray, amen.

Deuteronomy 6:5-6

“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart.”

Luke 6:45
“The good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth what is good; and the evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth what is evil; for his mouth speaks from that which fills his heart.”

Ezekiel 36:26-27

I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you;
I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.
And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be
careful to keep my laws.

Ezekiel 11:19-20

I will give them an undivided heart and will put a new spirit in them;
I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh.
Then they will follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. They will be
my people, and I will be their God.


A vow made. A vow kept.

A vow made...

Imagine taking a trip to offer a sacrifice and pay vows to the Lord your God–a trip you took every year and one day you don’t go…that is what a woman named Hannah did:

“Then Elkanah went up with all his household to offer to the LORD the yearly sacrifice and pay his vow. But Hannah did not go up, for she said to her husband, ‘I will not go up until the child is weaned; then I will bring him that he may appear before the LORD and stay there forever.’” 1 Samuel 1:21-22

Why did she stay back? Hannah had remembered her vow to God.  She had a deep sense of commitment to remain back to begin to honor the vow she took, to fulfill her role, and to do the task at hand—feed her baby the milk God supplied…and she would not go up until her son was weaned.

As a mother I read this and so many convictions and areas needing refinement in me are exposed.

Before I was a surrendered Christian yielded to the Holy Spirit, and before my new undivided heart I was divided and pulled many directions…always feeling the draw to “go” to a different type of “up.” For me, it was “up” the ladder of what the world would call ‘success.’ In the minds of many, I had “made it” and even after having my children I had been encouraged to keep going “up.” What was my encouragement, my treasure? Money, accolades, pride, selfishness, pleasing man, the desires of the world. I thought if I “go up” by the world’s standards I would give my children a better life.

Our first born son...

Now that I am a committed Christian wife and mommy I STILL feel the pull and temptation to “go up” where others may go. This time the “go up” is about serving God. Today the many things that pull or tempt me to “go up” include: the feeling of missing out, wanting to be involved, selfishness, pleasing others, and pride (yup that’s still there).

I struggle a lot with a different sense of “missing out.” Instead of missing out on what the world offers I struggle with missing out on the impact I can do for God if I’m not involved in all these different ministries–I can fall into the trap of trying to make an impact for God’s kingdom in my own strength, forgetting it is He who works in me both to will and to work for His good pleasure, and forgetting the vow I took as a child of God, wife and mommy.

Then I read about Hannah.  A committed woman…to God, to her husband, and to her son.  A woman who has not forgotten her vow but fulfills it.  Only until her son was weaned would she go up…and not only would she go up but she would give God a huge sacrifice: her first born son.  She did not sacrifice him by death but by His life—dedicating him to God causing her to see her son only once a year.  This was a son she wanted but could never have because of a closed womb.  A son she wept bitterly for as she spoke to God in her heart and poured out her soul before the LORD asking God to remember her.  She made a vow she would give her child to the LORD “all the days of his life…” When it was time to fulfill that vow she does not give begrudgingly but praises God and gives to Him from a heart of gratitude!

Praying we keep the vow to raise our children to love God...

I can remember asking God for a child. He remembered me. I have been given three (one is with Him). Today I give my children a different type of milk–the purity of His Word.  My husband and I have dedicated our children to God, remembering they are gifts from Him…there will be a day when they will be weaned, and begin to eat solid food—by His mercy and grace they will grow by His daily Bread; By His mercy and grace they will begin to feed themselves and live by every Word out of the mouth of God.

I pray I don’t give in to the temptation to “go up” or anywhere for that matter, until they are weaned…until God directs me.

God remembered me. I pray I always remember Him, and fulfill the vow I made to raise my children to love and know Him. I pray, I’ll always remember, they are God’s little lambs and my husband and I are stewards and shepherds following the direction of the Great Shepherd.

I pray I never forget the reason none of us have to take a ‘yearly’ trip to make a sacrifice for our sins because: It. Is. Finished. Jesus has died on the cross for our sins and has made the final sacrifice (*Hebrews 10:10-14). And that’s not all…Jesus rose from the dead on the third day and is alive, and today His Spirit lives in me helping me to keep the vow I took as a child of God, wife, and mother.

Whether your children are from your womb, adopted, or foster you too probably prayed to God for these precious gifts we call children.  I pray we have thankful hearts bringing them before the Lord daily.  I pray they will stay with God loving and worshiping Him forever.

*Don’t take my commentary for it~Be blessed and feed yourself by reading 1 Samuel 1:1-28; 1 Samuel 2:1-21 tell me what God shows you…


Teachable moment on God’s Love

My journal entry dated Summer 2010
 
 
The other day we were at a friend’s house when my 3-year-old little girl tried to play with two other older girls, but they closed the door and didn’t let her in.  My daughter came running to me with tears in her eyes saying, “Mommy they won’t share and they don’t want to play with me…” I must admit I am ashamed of my immediate reaction which was of my natural flesh fueled by hurt and sadness for my daughter.  I know what it’s like to see cliques of people enjoying each others’ company and not welcoming you to join them.  Unfortunately I have plenty of journal entries crying out to God about this hurt and rejection…it is from this hurt I initially responded:
 

I whispered in her ear, “Its OK we will go to the pool later and play with two other little girls.”

 
 

Instead of giving my daughter the ‘Bread of Life’ I gave her the dust of the world leaving her heart empty of God’s Word and thirsty for His Holy Spirit.  I took an easy road, giving her an opportunity to put her hope and happiness in a person or circumstance and not in Jesus Christ.  My daughter then said to the two girls, in a very bragging (unloving) tone, “We’re going to the pool and you can’t come!”  Only then was I convicted and repented and sought God’s forgiveness for not ‘diligently teaching’ her His Word.  After this confession and cleansing, I allowed myself to listen and obey the voice of the Holy Spirit…He who conceals a transgression seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates intimate friends.” Proverbs 17:9

 
 

The brown eyes I must diligently teach about Him

I bent down on my knees, looked into her big brown eyes and told her, “God loves you, and God loves those little girls who hurt your feelings.” I asked her a question.  “What are the two greatest commandments?” And her little voice replied with hand gestures to go with each word, “love God with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength, and love your neighbor as yourself.”  Yes! My next step as her mother was to teach her ‘How’?  How can you love someone when they hurt you? How Mommy?

 

 I told her we can pray right now and ask God to give us the grace to forgive them and to love them.  We prayed right there, we prayed for the little girls that hurt her, and we prayed for ourselves…we prayed Matthew 22:37-39 and we asked for God’s grace to forgive and love the Way He commanded us to love. After prayer, my daughter immediately changed her behavior and invited them to the pool.  Before we left, one of the little girls asked me, “You’re already teaching her Scripture?  But she’s so little…”  I smiled and told her,

“Even infants in their Mommy’s tummy are at the perfect age to learn about God’s love!  Yes, my daughter like you IS little and Jesus says, in Matthew 19:14 let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.

 Mothers, Grandmothers, Aunts, anyone around children meditate on this:

…the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

Wow! God gave us an example through children to show us what heirs of the kingdom of heaven can look like!  Also, what a responsibility not to hinder them from coming to Jesus! Those little eyes are watching us.  They are watching to see if we ‘do’ what we teach them.  Consider our Great Teacher, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ–what did He do?  He humbled Himself…He even washed the feet of the disciples….all 12 of them!  Yes, even Judas Iscariot, the one He knew that was going to betray Him.  When Jesus had finished washing their feet He asked:

 

“Do you understand what I have done for you?”

You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am.  Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet.  I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.  Very truly I tell you, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him.  Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.”

John 13:12-17

 

Jesus washes His Disciples' feet...so should we

If my Lord and Savior, the Son of God can humble Himself and wash the feet of someone He knew was going to betray Him (Judas) and those that would deny Him (the rest of the disciples), who am I to not humble myself to love those who hurt me? My actions will show whether or not I truly ‘understand’ what Jesus has done for me.  My little children are His lambs.  I’ve been entrusted to teach them His Word diligently by reading the Bible to them and showing them how to walk His truth out.  I am thankful His Holy Spirit helps me to teach my children by bringing to remembrance His Word every teachable moment opportunity! I’m so thankful that I listened and obeyed….this time.

Father, help us to seize each moment to teach children diligently about Your commandments and the Way (Jesus) to obey Your commandments through the power of Your Holy Spirit.  Thank you for this opportunity to teach and relearn about love and forgiveness.

 
 

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.  The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love.  By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him.  In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins.  Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.”

1 John 4:7-11


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